EASTER DAY

EASTER SUNDAY

Luke 24^1-12

FORSAKEN

There were harrowing pictures and stories this week from the Foreign Secretary, William Hague’s trip to Congo with the film star Angelina Jolie. Horrific scenes of internal refugee camps; stories of rape, violence and brutality against women and children.

 The stories that continue to flow from Syria, and her neighbouring nations hosting refugees, reveal children and families traumatised, abandoned and wondering if there is any hope.

 The world is full of people and places that seem forsaken, abandoned, lost.

 In our own land a growing number wrestle with their relative poverty; homes that are not fit to live in; shortage of food etc. people here can feel forsaken.

 The same can happen when a loved one dies; the gap in our lives can be so large we feel alone, abandoned, forsaken.

 On Good Friday here in the Minster we reflected on Jesus prayer from the Cross ‘My God, my God why have you forsaken me?’ Good Friday is about loss, abandonment, forsakenness. It is grim.

 On the Sunday morning still numbed by all that had happened, a small group of women made their way very early to Jesus’ tomb to complete the burial they had had to rush on Friday because of the onset of the Sabbath.

 For 36 hours they had been unable to do anything. They had been left in their sorrow, in their forsakenness. It must have felt very deeply that God had abandoned them.

 So when they arrive at the tomb, find the stone rolled away and the body gone, no wonder they were perplexed. Even the body was now not available for them to anoint with spices. They cannot even grieve properly. Their forsakenness deepens.

 FEARFUL

 Then to add to their forsakenness fear is added. Two strange men in dazzling apparel appear inside the tomb and speak with them. No wonder they were frightened and bowed their faces to the ground. There was so much confusion in their minds already as to how the triumphant entry of a week ago had turned so wrong and ended up with their Master crucified. The added confusion of how their male friends had all deserted him at his time of need, and now a missing body. Their minds must have been turning cartwheels – forsaken, and fearful.

 These two angels don’t go in for a long explanation; they get straight to the point ‘Why do you seek the living among the dead? He is not here, but has risen.’

 No wonder their reaction is varied

-    in Mark they flee trembling, astonished, fearful;

-    in Matthew they have a mixture of fear and great joy;

-    in Luke they appear to grasp at least some of the angel’s point – only to be completely disbelieved by the men when they tell them the story.

 Forsaken, fearful and the first flickers of faith. It will take the appearance to Mary Magdalene, the appearance to Simon Peter, the conversation with Cleopas and his friend on the road to Emmaus, and the appearance in the evening in the Upper Room to really begin to help them grasp the truth – He is risen.

 His risen-ness means they are not forsaken after all. He has not abandoned them but is with them. They need not fear all that they had come to fear of death and loss; although a new holy fear, awe and wonder, will grow as the reality truly dawns on them. Faith will fan into flame.

 The wonder of the resurrection of Jesus is the wonder that God has not forsaken or abandoned us. He is alive, present, real, alongside. He has conquered death and pulled us through it with him. He has dealt with sin and its consequences. It is news that should make us tremble, and be astonished; it should fill us with great joy – and inspire a deep holy fear.

 SO WHERE DOES THIS LEAD US THIS EASTER SUNDAY?

 So where does that take us this Easter morning?

 1) Moving from forsakenness to awareness of God’s loving presence is not always quick, and is often a bumpy journey. Too often we try and make the journey ourselves, or expect others to do it too quickly; rather than recognise it is a journey with bumps in the road; sometimes severe bumps.

 2) Looking forsaken does not mean that a person, or place is finally forsaken.

I have been privileged to visit a refugee camp and a displaced persons camp. The people I met were both forsaken but also spoke of the Presence of God with them there. The pictures on the news are not the whole story; however forsaken a place or people may appear God has not abandoned such people or places. Indeed it may be that the presence of God, the risen Jesus, is found more profoundly and really than it is in our comfortableness.

 3) Sharing the story of the Risen Jesus is a vital part of how we help others know that God has not forsaken them, or us. We may tell the story haltingly, with trembling and a mixture of conviction and oubt but tell the story we must. Our society needs to hear afresh the truth of Easter. It will only hear it as we speak it out to our neighbours and friends. We are the witnesses to the resurrection.

 This Easter may we share with the first witnesses the shock, astonishment, disbelief, surprise, joy, faith and reality of the presence of Jesus. Even in the bleakest, darkest places may this be true. And may we speak of the risen Jesus to a world that nees to hear the good news that He is risen.

 

 

 

GOOD FRIDAY REFLECTIONS

GOOD FRIDAY

 ‘My God, my God why have you forsaken me?’

 Three prayers of Jesus from the Cross are recorded in the gospel accounts. In strict chronological order they are

 ‘Father, Forgive them for they know not what they do’

 this prayer, ‘My God, my God why have you forsaken me?’

 and finally, ‘Father into your hands I commend my Spirit.’

 I begin today with the prayer of abandonment simply because the other two both come in Luke and I wanted us to reflect on them consecutively.

 Jesus at prayer is a central aspect of his final hours. John has his long prayer recorded in John 17, prayed in the Upper Room with the disciples at the close of the Last Supper.

Matthew, Mark and Luke record his praying in Gethsemane. Anguished praying focussed on all that lies ahead. Judas Iscariot has gone to betray him; he knows the disciples will abandon him; he knows that trial, conviction and death are imminent. In Gethsemane he abandons himself to the Father’s will; he commits to drinking the cup of suffering. It is agonising prayer. Luke tells us he sweats as if it were drops of blood.

 Jesus was nailed to the cross by the Roman soldiers and lifted into position ‘at the third hour’ that is 9.00 a.m. for the next three hours he was taunted by the robbers on either side of him; by the passing crowd – some of whom at least had probably cheered him into Jerusalem just a few days before; and mocked by chief priests, scribes and elders – who normally avoided such public executions.

 We cannot begin to understand the physical pain he was enduring let alone the mental and emotional anguish. There was support from some women standing by, but he was without hope of relief or release.

He saw the soldiers dividing his garments between them by playing dice. Psalm 22 was surely brought to mind by it all.

Read Psalm 22 : 6-8, 14-18

If so then also the prayers of the Psalmist weould come to mind– 22:9-11, 19-21

 But then after three hours, the sky darkens, the pain increases, the thirst grows; the mockery continues, except from one of the criminals who radically changes his tune! Jesus’ awareness of desolation, of abandonment, of God’s judgement being exercised apparently deepens and strengthens until he cries in prayer in the opening words of Psalm 22 ‘My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?’

 Here at this point he is abandoned, desolate, forsaken, even by the Father whose will he sought always to do. The Father who gave him the words to speak. The Father who anointed him with the Spirit. The Father who declared him to be ‘My Son, my beloved in whom I am well pleased.’

No ‘well pleased’ here, for here there is abandonment, total desolation. Here Jesus is alone.

All who through pain, suffering, loss, anguish, abuse, rejection, feel utterly forsaken and abandoned have a fellow sufferer; a companion who has been there himself. Drained of all sense of being loved, valued, cared for, Jesus, the Son of God, is forsaken.

And yet he still says ‘My God, my God’ – although utterly forsaken, totally abandoned he still sees God as his God.

He still clings on to a belief that God is there and he is still connected to him. However utterly forsaken and abandoned he is.

Here is a deep mystery – that in the total forsakenness of bearing the sins of the world; of taking the judgement of God against all human sin into and upon himself – and thus being cast off – he still knows God is God, and is ‘My God’.

We can never plumb the depths of the mystery of prayer and how in it we maintain our connection with God or his with us. Yet it is true.

We can never grasp the depth of the tearing apart of the Father, Son and Spirit. God rends himself apart. In the deepest divine mystery of all God breaks himself apart by abandoning his incarnate Son to the horrors of death on the Cross as the sin bearing Lamb of God; as the scape-goat who carries our sin away from us.

This is all caught up in this anguished prayer ‘My God, my God why have you forsaken me?’ as we hear the prayer again we know that because he prayed it, and experienced it, in the deepest sense of all we will never have to do so.

 TWO

‘Father, forgive them, they know not what they do’

 Mary and Joseph were both told by the angel that they were to call their baby Jesus. Joseph was specifically told that this was because he ‘would save his people from their sins’. We don’t know when Joseph and Mary shared the stories of Jesus’ divine conception but we can be sure that they did at some point. Jesus knew his name, Yeshua, the Lord saves, was significant; it spoke of his calling and purpose.

 Throughout the three years of his public ministry forgiveness was a central feature of both Jesus’ teaching and his actions.

 He assured the paralytic lowered through the ceiling ‘Your sins are forgiven you’ and then healed him to demonstrate to the teachers who questioned him that he had the authority to forgive sins (Luke 5:20-26).

 He deliberately mixed with those who were regarded as ‘sinners’ offering them God’s welcome and a fresh start.

The woman who washed his feet with her tears and dried them with her hair was assured ‘Your sins are forgiven’ (Luke 7:48).

 The women taken in the act of adultery was set free, yet told ‘Go and sin no more’ (John 8:1-12)

 In his teaching Jesus taught ‘love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you’ (Luke 6.27f). The Parable of the Prodigal Son taught the generosity of God in forgiveness (Luke 15).

 So in this prayer Jesus was practising what he had taught. Here he is loving his enemies even as they taunt and mock him. He is praying God’s Blessing on them as they curse him.

 Jesus recognises that there is an ignorance in his persecutors. They do not know what they are doing. They fail to recognise who he is, what crime they commit. They believed they were doing the right thing in getting rid of Jesus. They were ignorant of their sin. They were ignorant too of the significance of what was happening.

Here the salvation of the world is being worked out. In this very act of dying Jesus is bringing about the forgiveness of all sin – yet they do not; they cannot see this.

 Ignorance of our sin still lives with us. We speak to and of one another in ways which are dishonouring, even cursing. We do not realise how deeply our words can pierce and hurt. We cast looks at each other which speak anger, dislike, hatred. We hurt by our looks, or our failure to look. We pass each other by without a word or a smile. We appear to snub or ignore. We buy our food or clothing with no thought of the impact on an oppressed farmer, a slave labour child, or an exploited seafarer. We are genuinely ignorant of so much of our sin.

 Even when sin is deliberate, as the cursing and crucifixion were here, we are ignorant of the real pain we cause; the depth of damage we incur; the suffering we cause.

 Yes human beings are capable of remarkable feats of love and courage. We amazingly express something of the image of God in us all which is marred rather than totally destroyed. We must be deeply thankful for it all. But we must never pretend we are innocent bystanders; essentially alright and good when we are the people in the crowd crying ‘Crucify’. It is our voices that mock, our words that wound. We may be ignorant in many ways but we know we are as guilty as this crowd.

 And from the Cross Jesus prays for us ‘Father, forgive them’. He blesses us. He offers us forgiveness. Just as he did to the dying thief who asks ‘Jesus remember me’ he does for us ‘Today you will be with me in Paradise.’ He welcomes us, forgives us, does not condemn us for he takes the condemnation into himself for us. He knowingly takes on the sin so that we can knowingly be forgiven.

 Reflect on your sinfulness, turn to him and say ‘Jesus remember me’ and hear him say ‘Forgiven’.

 THREE

‘Father, into your hands I commit my spirit.’

 In Matthew and Mark there is simply a ‘loud cry’ and in Mark, Jesus ‘breathed his last’; in Matthew he ‘yielded up his spirit’. John has the triumphant concluding cry ‘It is finished’ and then Jesus ‘bowed his head and gave up his spirit’. Only Luke has the words of a prayer accompanying the yielding up of his spirit; the giving up of his life.

 ‘Father’ indicates the continued intimacy between Jesus and his Father seen in the way he prayed throughout his life, and the way he taught the disciples to pray. It is there in the last prayer we considered, ‘Father, forgive them’. There is not here the anguish of abandonment that Matthew and Mark record with “My God, my God why have you forsaken me?” Here with the final prayer intimacy and assurance is renewed. Should we be surprised? Are the evangelists disagreeing with each other?

 Well as we noted earlier ‘My God, my God’ is drawn from Psalm 22. This final prayer is drawn from Psalm 31:5. Jesus is again using the words of a Psalm to pray.

 In both Psalms the writer expresses the opposition they face; the awareness of being hunted down, pursued, cursed, and yet in both there is too expression of trust in God. Often in the Psalms generally the Psalmist ranges between feeling God is distant, not listening, ineffective, inactive and also trusting that he is still there, will act and vindicate his servant. The Psalmist’s word and thoughts can swing widely within one psalm. The same can be said of the prophets like Isaiah and Jeremiah. They can feel abandoned, and yet trust.

 It seems the same is true for Jesus. The very fact that he draws on two Psalms that do this within themselves points us to understanding that somehow both can be true. Jesus is utterly abandoned, in anguish at being forsaken, and yet able to confidently commit his life, his breath into his Father’s hands.

  Here in this final prayer Jesus expresses his trust that ultimately his life, and his vindication lies not with himself but with the Father. Hence the triumphant ‘It is finished’. The work is done; he knew that he had to suffer and die, and here he has accomplished and completed that calling.

 What becomes of him; what is the outcome of this act of sacrifice is not for him to determine but for his Father. He trusts God that He will work it out. His purpose will be fulfilled. His glory will be upheld. Somehow through forsakenness, abandonment, innocent suffering, laying his life down as the sacrificial Passover lamb, God will work it out.

 This is the faith expressed by ‘Father into your hands I commit my spirit’. It is hard for us to grasp because we know what happened next. We know he was vindicated, the Father did raise him from the dead, the good news of forgiveness in his name, has spread through all the earth. The disciples did return, got it and spread the word. But at that moment of final release this is an ordinary prayer of faith and confidence in his Father who has abandoned him.

 Prayer is extraordinarily risky. It can appear reckless, pointless, fruitless. It can appear mad because it can fly in the face of all the evidence in front of us. All can appear to say God is no longer here; God does not care; God is ineffectual; evil has triumphed; good has been abandoned; hope is gone – and yet we still say Father into your hands I commit – I/We cannot do anything; we cannot see the way through; all seems lost, hopeless and helpless, and yet we still say ‘Father into your hands I commit’.

 Jesus went this way so that we would know that we can follow. He went through the Cross so that we too, when we face apparent failure, loss, abandonment and forsakenness can, like him, also say Father into your hands I commit my life.

 

MAKING SPACE IN 2013

New Year 2013

 

When I look at my diary for the coming year it looks very full. I could not handle my role without a diary, nor without prayerful, thoughtful planning. You may, or may not, operate life with a diary. The one thing I am very grateful for when I look at all the appointments and events which fill 2013 is that built in there is space.

 

Now please do not misunderstand me. I love visiting parishes, schools, work places and events. I am excited by these and by key things like the Lent Series (in Newark & Southwell and Bassetlaw & Bawtry Deaneries) and the Prayer Walk (in Newstead Deanery in May). But I need space and am glad it is built in. Space to rest, relax, reflect, renew through days off and holidays. Space to read, pray, think on Quiet Days, or the Leadership Development days I have this year. We all need space.

 

I find myself increasingly concerned by the pressure of our society to make rapid decisions; to fix things quickly; to ‘do something’. It is a pressure on politicians all of the time; partly through the media’s power but also through the ever present desire to seek re-election. The media is always pushing for ‘an answer’, or for creating the next ‘big/new thing, or person or band or star’. Always pushing, never waiting. Filling the space with sound, pictures, events and stories – you cannot leave any space.

 

My fear is that the failure to make space, to take time, leads to un-thought-out decisions. It leads to hasty rather than lasting solutions. It leads to insufficient analysis and understanding. It deals with symptoms not causes; it plasters over cracks rather than dealing with foundations.

 

Now people can use delay to put things off. We can dither rather than decide. We do not want leaders in any walk of life and at any level of responsibility to simply go round in circles or fail to ever offer a lead. Sometimes we do just have to get on and act. However our current danger it seems to me, in society and in church, is to go for too hasty solutions. We need to create space to allow God’s voice to be heard clearly.

 

In the Gospels Jesus, we are told, regularly created space. He went off on his own to pray. He withdrew from the pressure of the crowd. His friends were so moved by how he prayed they asked him “Teach us to pray”. He took time. But having done so he acted, and focussed clearly on what the Father was calling Him to do.

 

In 2013, whatever your job, your studies, your family, your interest I encourage you to recover the importance of space. Take time; make time to be still. Take time; make time to listen, reflect, pray. Take time; make time to be with God. Do so regularly; day by day; week by week; month by month. Then having made space, be active in pursuing God’s purpose for you, and for the world.

 

Women Bishops Vote

I am surprised at just how sad and low I am feeling this evening after the vote at General Synod today. I wanted the legislation to pass. I genuinely believed it was the best we could do to enable us to go forward together. I feel gutted for the wonderful women we have who would make excellent bishops. I am gutted too for younger women coming into the church; I had hoped this evening there would be no glass ceiling for them. But I am gutted for us all as I think we would all gain by women in the episcopate.
However I then have to recognise that we have all been praying for the Spirit to lead us and teach us. So with the outcome as it was I have to start reflecting on what the Spirit might be saying to us. These reflections might be wrong but they are my first humble stab.
The majority of synod voted Yes. Indeed if we were not divided by houses the legislation would have had the necessary two thirds majority. So might the Spirit be saying, “Yes, you are right, this is the direction in which I am calling you.” But the laity, though a majority said Yes, failed to give the two thirds required. Here I wrestle with what the Spirit might be saying. It could be that the voice here is speaking of a need for reform, a call to laity to join in more fully for I am sure this is not representative of the laity across the church as a whole. But it could be the Spirit saying, Yes, right direction of travel but wrong route; using the voice of the people to tell us all clearly. But then if this latter is true we could quickly divide into those who say Yes the Spirit is telling us we should have had a single clause; whilst others will say the Spirit is telling us we have failed to provide graciously and fully enough for the minority. Tonight I cannot say, and anyway it is not my personal view but the corporate mind of the church that has to be determined.
The Church of England really does want women as bishops, that is clear. But sadly enough think we have not found the right route to have stalled the way.
One thing appears clear to me; we have to find a different way of doing the business as and when we return to it – which we will. Somehow we have to find ways in which all really do think and feel that they have been listened to fully.
So deep sadness; some anger and a commitment to work towards finding a way that will ensure thorough support in all 3 houses in the coming years. Meanwhile I will also keep working to see women and men develop as leaders together in my diocese.

BLIND MAN WALKING

Everywhere you travel in Burundi the streets are full of people walking. Carrying goods to and from the market. The better off have bicycles to use; the loads they carry are huge. You become used to this sight and yet never quite accustomed to it because always there are fascinating new sights that occur. Some of these stick, like the blind man walking. We only saw him for a few seconds as we drove through his small village. He was old; on his head he was carrying a very large pot which he held with his right hand. In his left hand was his long stick with which he swept the street before him guiding him down the slope along the edge of the road. His eyelids were closed. A few seconds and we had driven by never to see him again. He could never see us. No doubt his hearing told him a large 4×4 was driving past him. He trusted the driver to take care; he would have taken care himself. What help others might give him in this village is unknown. Whether or not he has a family who care and support I have no idea. What I know is that the image has lived with me of a man determined to go on; battling against the odds; a man who somehow inspires me to be continually grateful for sight, for a society that seeks to treat the disabled well, but regularly fails. A man who takes me back to a blind man sat by the side of a pool whom Jesus meets and talks with, then puts mud made from his own spit and the soil on his eyes and tells him to go and wash. A blind man who trusts in the word of this man and discovers sight. I doubt this Burundian man will ever see with his eyes but somehow I pray he will know the sight that Jesus brings that gives the light of life.

BUJUMBURA FINAL DAYS

Meeting together back at Bujumbura Diocesan Community Centre everyone is full of stories. There are a lot of laughs at incidents that at the time may have been infuriating, or worse. What is clear is that each group has had an amazing adventure. Inevitably there have been some difficult moments, even longer periods but overall the impression is hugely positive. Key things people highlight are the hard working life of the people here; the growth of the church; the youthfulness of nation and church; the incredible hospitality everyone has received; the beauty of the mountains, hills and Lake Tanganyika; the vibrancy of worship and the desire for developing a meaningful companionship between our Diocese and the Province here.
We have time to share, tell stories and reflect. We pray together.
After a mixed nights sleep (Bujumbura is hot and sticky and gets going as soon as light is appearing), most of the group go shopping. Markets are good places to get some feel of ordinary life. They are places for taking care with money and passports (all over the world). You know you have to take care when your hosts tell you they always do in such a setting. Crafts are bought; material is found all return happy. For two of us there is a visit to the Police to meet with their chaplains. For our policeman and vicar who acts as a local police chaplain it proves a valuable and interesting visit. The police here are largely ex military and run along military lines. Chaplains are therefore a part of the whole structure, not just voluntary. The assessment is that we might have more to learn about police chaplaincy from the people here than they from us. For a further three of us it is 2.5 hours with Andre the Christian Aid country manager for here and Rwanda. We have a brilliant time hearing about the work in these 2 countries. The clear focus for CA on Community development, HIV/AIDS work and governance is outlined. Clarity of focus helps decide where limited resources should be spent but sometimes means hard decisions being made about bringing projects to an end. There is a real desire to be programme rather than project based. For the first 2 areas of programme the Anglican Church of Burundi is a key partner but Andre would love to see them engaged in the governance work as well. For HIV work there is also a strong partnership with a main Pentecostal denomination that is spread across the whole land; radio work is also important in getting the educational messages out. Andre is very aware of the limits of what CA can do because of having only 6 staff and limited funds. He longs for closer cooperation between the various agencies who are here from around the world. CA itself shares a building with Trocaire & Norwegian Church Aid. He dreams of more open cooperation; all power to him in this I think. We talk about our partnership with the Province and with CA in England. We share ideas and explore some of the pros and cons of these. He is a delight. He is incite full, thoughtful and prepared to think and act prophetically. He is a good advocate for CA in this nation and it’s neighbour.
In the afternoon we hold a debrief with 4 of the 6 bishops (+Pie is in Nairobi for a meeting representing them all; + Martin has continuing car problems). Each member of the team shares openly and positively about their time here. Together we are able to not only say what we have seen but reflect on what we have learned. There is trust here so people are also able to note some of the difficulties that occurred, or disappointments ( it has to be said there a very few of these). In turn the bishops reflect on what they have seen of us; what they have valued about the visit. There is an extremely positive feel.
We talk about possible future developments; everyone agrees that organic growth must be better than trying to do anything too structural at this stage. The growing of friendship through prayer and mutual exchange remains high on everyone’s agenda. There a ways forward but right now is not the time to note these in such a public way. Time for reflection and then future action is always needed after such an intense time together.
I am deeply proud of the team who have travelled with me. They have represented our diocese well. They have travelled well together, looking out for each other; caring and supporting. They have been open to a huge range of new experiences and challenges. As one member noted ‘I will never be the same again.’ None of us will.
The day is rounded off with a fabulous evening together over a terrific meal at Le Flambard, a truly Burundian restaurant of very high quality. + Pie, back from Nairobi, joins us along with Provincial staff. We all learn yet more but around the room there are smiles, laughter, teasing and glorious conversation. Something has happened at a deep level between us as people of God together. We have made or deepened friendships further. It is such an honour to call these people friends. The friendship for Rosemary & I with ++Bernard and Mathilde is particularly special; they are truly wonderful examples of following Jesus, heading a family and leading the church.
For 4 of us Lake Tanganyika has not been seen on this trip so for our final morning we all head for the beach to relax for an hour or two. Karera Beach is beautifully sandy with palm trees for shade. The water is clear and warm. We had been warned of crocodiles out in the water but a local boatman assures us that today they are elsewhere up the river Ruzizi. We paddle, exec
T for Rosemary who having decided she would come ready to swim glides in. We watch fishermen at work, and I will reflect on this elsewhere another day. It is simply beautifully relaxing. In dry season the mountains of Congo and Burundi that line this beautiful lake are so shrouded that they cannot be seen, even thou the sun is shining brightly overhead. Children are playing in the water. Here children the world over are the same; lots of fun, laughter, teasing and sheer joy in the warm waters. It is a great way to spend our final morning together. Quiet conversations happen between us, sometimes in a larger group, at others just one to one. The group mixes around, a healthy sign. Then it is time to go; driving back
Past the UN base which I remember from 2000-1 as vast, now a very small presence; a sign of more peaceful times here and less troubled refugee camps in close by Congo ( though sadly no less troubled at all). A final Burundian lunch before completing the packing and the start of the long journey home. There is for me 1 more conversation to be had, reflecting with +Bernard on his time at the Global South Conference in Bangkok and how we see things in the Anglican Communion at present. I find his perspectives deeply thoughtful and wise.

MUYINGA

Our first evening in Muyinga is a quiet one. Aft tea with Bishop Eraste and his wife Consolata we move into the house which will be our home for the next few days. This was the home of Steve & Lucy McIlhenny when they were here as CMS Mission Partners establishing the Bethesda Centre. They have now returned and a short term partner from Crosslinks comes next month. After staying in guest houses / hotels it is a pleasant change having our own house. We even cater for ourselves on this first evening ( only toast and fruit which after all we have been fed is plenty).
The previous Diocesan group have left us helpful notes. There is a pet dog Asher and Gaspar is the house guard. A quiet evening gives everyone the chance to catch up on journals ( or in my case blog).
Early morning the cock starts crowing; in the distance the Muslim call to prayer can be heard. The birdsong is glorious; no familiar sounds at all but such a variety of songs. activity outside begins around 6. Natasha arrives to assist with breakfast. Here our minimal French has to meet with her minimal English along with our few Kirundi greetings. We get there; breakfast is the usual omelette, bread and tea ( or coffee). Today is Saturday so it is community work hours for everyone between 8 & 10. We are left to quietly read, write, relax, pray before the days visits begin.
Our conversation turns to the history and politics of this land and it’s neighbour; of Germans and Belgians; of Tutsi and Hutu; of conflict and killings; of current governments and the desire to be Burundian or Rwandan rather than defined by an ethnicity. Yet the history continues to underlie it all. I pray for truly lasting peace, deep reconciliation and the yearning of all ‘Never again!’
Mukoni Primary school on the edge of Muyinga has just over 1,200 pupils who attend in separate morning and afternoon sessions. There a 20 teachers and a head teacher. The school governors are gathering for a meeting as we arrive. They have textbooks but nothing like an adequate number for this many pupils. There are 13 classrooms some built in the 1950s and very run down; the others well built in the 1980s. Each class therefore has 55-60 pupils. By P6 when the national exams are taken in the most recent round 94 of 99 who took the exam achieved the 50% or above to go on to secondary school. This is a high pass rate, though I have no idea whether 0, 11 or 21 did not sit the exam. There is a reasonable amount of outside space, with a handball pitch and a well cared for banana area & sorghum patch. However when the numbers are considered it must be very crowded when everyone is out to play.
The secondary school uses 2 of the classrooms from the Primary school and has 2 newer classrooms on the other side of the plot. This is another secondary school growing from S1 currently to S3. 275 pupils across 4 classes with a head teacher (new to the role) and 10 teachers. The average salary for a secondary teacher ( who will have a degree) is 130,000FB per month, around £65. This is almost twice that of a primary teacher ( no degree) at 70,000FB. When house rent is around 40,000FB per month it is understandable why many teachers, especially primary, seek to supplement their income with a second job. The structure of the day allows this too.
We are accompanied throughout by a group of around 10 children who sing for us, talk with us and hope for sweets from us (we have none). Some of these children attend this primary school. We don’t manage to ask them what they like about school; the head teacher’s presence might not help with honest answers anyway. Education does offer hope of a brighter future; but here for how many? Never again has to be accompanied by Never Give Up and Never Stop Believing Change is possible.
We move on to visit the Bible School where the Principal, Archdeacon Prudence, and 12 students welcome us. These men are so smartly dressed and have shiny shoes; clearly 2 bishops coming to visit, 1 of whom holds the power to authorise 8 of them as catechisms and ordain 4 of them as deacons means they want to be at their best. Here +Eraste outlines his hope for our partnership; that the longstanding partnership with St Mark’s will expand to the whole diocese. First friendship is sought. Where finance comes first friendship does not follow; money without love and friendship is useless. He makes the point that Burundi is a poor country but yet they are not poor because God is here with them. In our friendship we will share our concerns with one another not just our blessings. We must pray for each other in our journey of mission.
So far as the Bible School is concerned the principal says that the general situation is good but the lack of materials , notably prayer books, is a problem. The arrival of the new Kirundi Bible Commentary will help a great deal here. St Mark’s have supplied a good number for each diocese to put in their college libraries. We also visit their accommodation where we see that 4 share a room with 2 double beds also being shared. There are cows here and some land. The meal we see is basic but plentiful and overall they are content with their lot. Catechisms spend 3 months here then 9 back in the Parish. They do this for 4 years before being fully qualified. Deacons do a further year. In conversation with the bishop we also talk about the importance of holy living expected of church leaders.
Our first afternoon stop is at the ‘Stand Up and Build’ site on the edge of town. The title comes from Nehemiah’s words to the people of Israel as they rebuilt the walls of Jerusalem. +Eraste explains that after all the years of conflict it is now time for the people of the nation to stand up and build for the future, and the church is to lead the way. The plan is for a building technical college on the large site, given to the diocese by the government. The foundation stone is in place and the boundary markers are clear. However there is a small house on the site and around 10 Twa grass hut homes. The Twa approach speaking loudly and vociferously to the bishop. There is no need for translation they are clearly expressing their anger at having to move off the site. Quite quickly a large group is gathered, some are arguing with their own clearly expressing a different view. Eraste listens carefully acknowledging their words but making no response. He allows them to speak for a long while. Then eventually he calls for them to stop and he speaks. They listen though after a short while clearly object to a comment he has made.
Here is a serious dilemma for the bishop; he wants to build a college which will be to the advantage of the whole community. If he does not start within a couple of years the government will simply take the land back, give it to someone else and remove the Twa anyway. Yet the bishop wants the college to help the Twa too. We later learn that the diocese has helped this group already with food and clothing, and that they do plan to offer help to the group with planting and possibly materials for new homes, just on the other side of the valley. Working for the good of a community can create internal conflicts of justice and priority. The Twa are the despised of this society, others would not offer help at all. The church is on the horns of a dilemma. Eraste displayed real wisdom in handling a difficult situation. I am sure he will find the wisdom to guide them through.
It may sound perverse but this encounter is one of the highlights of our whole time in Burundi. It was so unexpected and clearly unplanned. There could be nothing but Eraste’s totally genuine response to it. It also highlighted the deep deep poverty of this group of people, and raised fresh questions of what justice looks like in a nation like this.
The Bethesda Project is unique in this nation. It aims to work with people with disabilities particularly using sport. 8 hectares at present undeveloped will become a centre of sport, recreation and education. Archery and some team building practices already take place here. We are challenged as a group of 4 to do a couple of the team building exercises. We cooperate pretty well but still need guidance to resolve in reasonable time. Then archery; great fun together. The project arose by Eraste being inspired on a visit to Kepplewray in Cumbria. Steve & Lucy McIlhenny spent 2 years developing the work. They are now in Ireland. Evariste now leads the work. It is a major project. The plans are clear and large. Part of the vision is to change attitudes to disability in the families who have disabled children ( they are often hidden away and treated as of no value); and in wider society. It is seeking to build God’s way of doing things for the disabled. It is a long vision; could there be Burundian Paralympians from this project in the future? Well why not?

JULY 22nd

Morning worship at Mukoni Cathedral. At 10.00 when we begin the building (previously a multipurpose community centre) is just under half full. By the close it is 3/4 full. There are very large numbers of children and young people. An unusually large number of choirs sing through the 3 hour service. I preach and as part of the sermon Phil & Poppy share stories from their churches illustrating the way in which Jesus breaks barriers down and brings diverse people together into the one new humanity in Jesus Christ. Apparently the small congregation that meets at the Diocesan Offices in the town had also joined us and every choir had wanted to sing for the visitors. I have been in longer services but never before a simple Morning Prayer that lasted this long. Children here are very patient when it comes to church; they sit for long periods and must be quite bored at times yet when they sing they do so with enthusiasm and joy. Most leave before the sermon to play outside ( no Sunday School this week). The youth choir are good. The worship band quite competent.
After lunch we have a quiet afternoon and evening – our first long period like this since we arrived. It gives plenty of time to chat, reflect, go for a wander ( as is usual 4 muzungu attract looks and comments) and catch up on this blog and journals.

JULY 23rd

In the early hours Rosemary & I awake with the sound of 2 cracks, like gunfire. We have no idea whether or not it was. The mind however races and you soon realise some of your own inner fears and insecurities. You also realise how self centred the world can be. The odds on anything being aimed at us must be very low indeed, yet somehow we can contrive to think we might be at the centre of things. We are all guilty of this centring the world on ourselves. It is the heart of our rebellion against God for He is the centre of all things; from him, through him and for him all things exist. I am most decidedly not the centre of the world. Yet I can rapidly think I am.
In the morning we discover that neither Phil nor Poppy had heard a thing!
We join the Diocesan Staff team for their morning devotions and their brief summary sharing of both how the past week had gone and what lies ahead this coming week. This is clearly a team. They appear to enjoy each others company, are glad to pray together at the start of each day, and care about each others work. The core of it all is a mix of leadership and community development. Leadership through the training of clergy and lay leaders, and enabling local people to grow in taking responsibility for their own affairs, through becoming literate, micro-finance and small businesses. As elsewhere the Mothers Union plays a critical role in this. There is a real care for orphans; 2005 are currently on the books with a staff of 3. The legal adviser offers a lot of support to orphans in the courts and at tribunals, mainly seeking to ensure they are protected from exploitation around their land and property rights. Other community development is around agricultural projects, based on sorghum, beans and other products. There is concern for water supply and protection. The buildings officer is concerned for both building churches and schools. The Diocesan Secretary, Perpetua, is a woman who is pleased to see women growing in confidence and taking on positions of leadership. She is delighted to be able to ask Poppy about women in theology and church leadership. With the appointment of the first woman bishop in Africa whilst we have been here it is clear that for a good number in this team they look forward to that possibility in Burundi too. We are also asked thoughtfully about how we as a diocese engage in community development where we are; so we are able to share some examples. It does come as a shock to Burundians that there are ever any people in need in England but they accept it when we tell them there are.
Then we head for Lake Kavuruga, which may only be 8 km from town but on the road we take is nearly an hour journey. This is a reservoir built in the early 1980s. Here Bethesda run their canoeing, they also have an archery sight and abseil down the side of the dam. We are well guided in our canoes by Evariste, Lambert & Davina, the 3 staff. We have a lot of fun. It did feel more like holiday than visit but gave us a real insight into the kind of activities Bethesda is seeking to do. It’s potential is huge. I was also delighted to see a Malachite Kingfisher, an African Fish Eagle and an as yet unidentified white water bird. I don’t know if they are thinking of adding birds to their activities but it is a possible option here. It will be fascinating to see how this project develops over the next few years. Weirdest sight of the day was on this return journey. 4 men wearing orange high viz jackets, 1 with a measuring wheel, and English stop / Go signs in the middle of nowhere. Apparently there are plans to make this dirt road into tarmac so there was a logic, but it was so incongruous and the high viz so unnecessary.
Our visit to Mukezi did not promise much. It is a village a few miles from Muyinga just off the Gitega road. The schools are on holiday so we knew we would be looking at empty classrooms; but we had also been told that unlike everywhere else we would not even meet the head teacher. It is actually an interesting Primary school as unlike many others it has an outside kitchen, a project linked with World Vision to ensure the children of this area get a decent meal each day. There are also 3 classrooms that are out of use and need serious refurbishment. 6 other classrooms are standard size but there are 2 of a different design; broader and with larger windows, with air vents above. A design others could copy. Inevitably some of the school’s pupils show up and follow us round. We then visit the small church. Here the unexpected occurred. The catechist appeared and we had a fascinating conversation with him. Brega is 24; he has undertaken 1 year of the catechist training so far. This small church (130 of whom 70 are children) was started by his parents and grandparents as a sub parish from the cathedral. They remain on the church council. Brega completed Primary school but did only 1 year of secondary education. He possessed his first Bible at 17, though had access to the family one before then. He has a Prayer Book and a Hymnbook. Of the responsibilities that a catechist has he most loves preaching. He works the family land but serves the church as catechist on 2 days each week as well as Sundays. He is clearly proud of his church and his work. He wants to develop as a catechist and hopes he might one day develop into a pastor; but he knows others will have an important say in all of this.
This is the core of how church happens here. Lay led by someone with a relatively low level of education who is unpaid. Where children and young people form the majority of the congregation yet have no specific provision. In buildings erected by the local community that are of no great standard and have inadequate seating even of the minimal bench style that exists. Yet valued and loved. Plus they are growing. Sociologists will have explanations for the dynamics taking place which Re valuable in understanding these things. But there is something very New Testament like about this. The good news of Jesus Christ is changing people’s lives, and changing communities in the land of the poor. Whilst where power and wealth prevail it struggles to have a similar impact.
This encounter is another of those unplanned ones which mean so much in understanding more of the life and church here. What looked an unpromising afternoon proved to be very valuable indeed.
The evening is our farewell party. It actually takes place in the garden of the house in which we have been staying. People arrive, move furniture around, set everything up. Food appears, so do drinks and eventually there are 28 guests; diocesan staff, members of the Cathedral congregation and Bible School. Burundians love their protocols ensuring everyone sits in just the right place. Only the bishop, his wife and the 4 of us as honoured guests have a table, which has a cloth on it. We have to take food first. People do not really talk whilst eating though they talk freely before and after. There are always speeches afterwards. The are genuine thanks; actually very moving; but there is also form to it. This evening however convention is broken when after the 2 bishops have had our say Rosemary is invited to speak, then also Phil & Poppy. We think it is all done when the head of laity stands to speak. What we have heard time and again during this visit is just how much it means that Rosemary & I have returned. This shows true friendship. The fact we have brought many others has also spoken deeply. This is not to blow our own trumpets but the power of this is very clear. Friendship for these sisters and brothers is truly expressed by being together. The giving up of the time is far more significant than the cost. There are real hopes of continuing friendship and sharing ahead. I hope these are realistic and not too high. I certainly have every intention of returning again. I also know I have a responsibility to advocate and speak for this tiny forgotten nation whose people have suffered so deeply and yet whose love shines so brightly.

JULY 24th

Morning devotions at the Diocesan Office are less well attended than the previous day; but Monday morning is staff meeting so everyone is in. Come Tuesday some will be out in the field meeting orphans etc.
Then it is time to say farewell. The gulf between the rich West and this nation becomes perhaps most apparent when handing what are in our terms very small gifts to those who have helped us during our stay; Elsie who has cooked our breakfasts and washed up afterwards, Gaspar the night guard and the day guardian whose name we never got. They are small gifts, T-towel, wind up torch, soap, small bar of chocolate and what for us is a minuscule amount of money. Yet their joy is very very evident. This for them s abundance. All the guidance is to somehow strike a balance; give too much and it is overwhelming and actually unhelpful.
Here is the catch for the consuming West. Consumption is okay, even necessary, as it helps move an economy forward etc. but over consumption takes away from others and exploits. How do we actually help Burundi develop whilst reining back our own over consuming? No easy answers available but somehow we need to find some; not just for Burundi’s sake but also for our own as we sleep walk into cultural, moral, spiritual and physical obesity.
Farewells done we drive to Bujumbura. At times a scary drive but we make it. En route, at Karuzi, there is an unexpected surprise that brings tears to Rosemary and my eyes. But that is another story to tell on another day.